Show me a happy marriage of 16-18 year olds

(Pro-script: Let me repeat that phrase for you feminists- “16-18 year olds happily married”. Neener neener neener!)

Unlike the feminist cult-happy sentiment of ‘no judge! bitch, I like my ability to make snap judgements a la Sherlock Holmes. It takes practice, but it is damn fun to tell a person about them-self having never met.

Unfortunately, this skill runs wild at times. The brain becomes a honed machine, attempting to retrace how a person’s life experiences have shaped said person. Things are noticed, vivisected, and hypothesized in the blink of an eye.

Thus, my observation: it is clear that the church is feminized. If it were not, where are the married couples of 16-18 year olds from religion’s glory days? With all of the church proselytism about the sanctity of chaste relationships, there should be *at least* a statistically significant population within the church that reflects this important belief.

Instead, there isn’t even a statistic outlier. Zilch.

Let me offer a personal story. My great grand father was born in 1909, my great grandmother 1910. They married when he was 18 and she was 17. Their marriage lasted until his death in 1984. They were married for fifty seven years. Game, set, match, bitches.

The thought is naturally hilarious to the swarm of white knight baby booming fem-centered apologists. The thought of a 17 year old girl relying on a 18 year old husband boy? Bwahhahahha. *So* old fashioned.

The only religion that seems to have pulled off preservation of youthful vows is the Amish and Mennonites who actively practice anti-technology. Maybe its time to ban cell phones from church property entirely. Reject the internet. Reject TV and media. Reject washing machines.

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